I AM HUNGRY

I think those nasty little Elves are trying to POISON ME. MY STOMACH HURTS. Or maybe SOME ONE HERE is trying to POISON ME. My stomach is making STRANGE NOISES and I feel SICK.

WHY DOES POISON SEEM LIKE THE LOGICAL WAY TO GO?

THIS IS ALL MY FATHER'S SNAPE'S FAULT. WHY DOESN'T HE KEEP THOSE MANGY ELVES IN ORDER??

And KEEP HARPER AWAY from MY stash!!!!

GINNY KISSED ME!!!!!!

She is a big fat FREAK and a DUMB GRYFFINDOR SLAG MAN WITH FAKE TITS!

AND NOW MY NOSE IS RUNNING AND I AM MAD!!!!!!!!

AHHHH!!!

I think that some one has been going through my food! If anyone has been going through my things especially my food!, I would advise you not to do so! I can be ferocious when I’m angry! I’ll hex you, unnamed culprit, if I find you snooping! You won’t have seen what’s coming because I’m so fast. And then you, whoever you are, will be very embarrassed and caught red-handed and I will be victorious and make you look like a complete arse in front of the entire school. Not to mention that you’ll gain a reputation as a thief and some one not to be trusted ever!

Anyway, I’m so hungry now I’ll have to reorganize everything and maybe I’ll place hexes on them to keep people away. YOU UNNAMED VILLIAN will contract a horrible case of itchy, hideous splotches all over your body.  I will have NO MERCY!!! Those who steal don’t deserve sympathy or mercy! They’re MY things! Don’t touch them! Ever! I will be angry! Just like I am now. I’ll make sure that Snape Slughorn hears about it! He’ll probably deal with it even more harshly than I will. I bet there are FINGERPRINTS EVERYWHERE. You’re lucky I’m not that invested in finding you, you lucky, NOSY little ponce, whoever you are.